Care Bears and Joe Brizz

I have a friend who will show the Care Bears movie to all his potential girlfriends (SHOES, by the way, Kelly- clearing that up quickly). This may or may not work as a guiding principal for all relationships, but goddamned if it doesn't work for him.

People tonight told me the idea was rubbish, that it would never impress them. I would agree with them, except I've seen it work. Work really well. Work so well and to such an extent eharmony.com was taking notes on matching procedures.

So maybe it's not the method, but the madness. Maybe an innate charm exists in a person. A lot of what I say isn't funny, but people laugh. Probably because I'm gorgeous and they don't want to upset me, but also maybe because it doesn't matter what I say. I'm just trying to inject some levity into the moment. If you've got the warm fuzzies for someone, anything they do or so is cute because that's what they are trying to be. Love is a slightly skewed perspective on life.

Example: Think of you last boyfriend/girlfriend. What the hell were you thinking? Seriously? What? But then at the time, you were so into that, girlfriend. I'm not offering reasons you went ahead and tapped Shelly the Barbarian or Pimply Dave, but I will say that its understandable. Sympathetic almost. Conditions, situations, extended periods of sexual isolation - they all come into play. Your whole sad, pathetic existence comes is a factor when choosing a life mate.

History too. You don't see the caviar crowd begging for triscuits and a wheel of cheese. They've been spoiled. But dine on spam and eggs for a few months, and some triscuits with melted cheese sounds good. It's all relativity. Grab a hold of a hot pan, and a minute can seem like an hour. Grab a hold of a hot girl, and an hour can seem like a minute.

So why do Care Bears work for Joe Brizz 100% of the time? I think, as I've been trying to prove, it's just Joe Brizz being himself. Politicians can recruit younger people all the time - not by their values or beliefs - but by their intensity and tone. Why should it be any different on a personal level? There are some things we just respond to. Cleavage. A dude playing a guitar. The Cardigan's brilliant masterpiece 'Love Fool'. Something instinctual tells us this would better us. I had a friend tonight tell me she was interested in thirty year old men because they offered stability and security. Gold Digging? Yes. But that's my point. We actively seek or passively submit to those characteristics we find necessary. So Joe Brizz has got it right. Maybe just being cute is enough, and the Care Bear crowd knows it.

Reminders for class: My weekends equal work and more work. Find some way to save me Saturday night. Seriously. It's my only free time.