Freezie Miracles

Proof God may exist:

I was eating a freezie pop, splitting a red between a green, when a slight tear ripped into the edge of the red one. I had put them both under hot water, making them slush like, when the liquid poured out of the bottom. It spilt all over the floor, the counter, all over existence. BUT NOT A DROP TOUCHED ME. I was wearing white, but not a single red, period looking dot got on me. Holy crow. Someone may be looking out for me.

Sometimes I question the relevance for seeking the existence of a higher power. Take paintings on cave walls from way the hell back when B.C. The primitive God-like etches from a cave dwellers perspective might seem like a crude way to explain existence. A God for crops, a a God for maternity... it all seemed like the most logical way to categorize life. If you can't find direct reason or purpose, place it in a higher power.

Now jump forward to about two days ago. Hurricanes, Tsunami, Economic Ruin. We still argue that a God willed all that - but the reason has changed. The hardcore religious would argue we deserved it. Lust, greed, sloth - pick your sin - but our actions and failure to praise him dictate the way God judges us.

Backtrack to the cavedwelling buddies of yesteryear. If they had a lousy harvest, would they say it was nature or more of a failure to appease the god's properly? Ah, I hear you saying something about the difference between their beliefs and yours. Valid point, I'm sure, but I'm not listening. Faith is cool. Organized religion is a crutch for the weak. HEY! Those weren't my words, Former Governor Jesse "The Mind" Ventura said that. He has a point though. I know many people who have faith but don't attend mass. These people rock.

Then there's the people who congregate in groups to find a common denominator to blame for the problems of the world. Seriously, Gays? Are Gays the real cause of all the problems the Catholic Church faces? Thanks Pat Roberston. Thanks Jerry Falwell. You truly are awesome. Liberty College needs to be taken down brick for brick and remade into a Gay Dance Club. I'd totally bounce there.

See, I tangeted when I started talking about religion. So many holes and I want to poke through all of them with my wang. For another night, I guess. For now, let's be thankful my white shirt didn't get dirty. That in itself was cool enough for me to forget the rest of the problems that accepting a miracle might bring about After all, it was a miracle. It's not like it was good luck or a coincidence. Just like a good harvest coming for our cave habitants. Miracles. Not just good soil and a green thumb.

Reminders for class: Holy cow, so many of my friends are out of college by January. Sweet!